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Because
children with ADHD often struggle in their school work, peer relations, and
ability to follow rules at home and at school, it is reasonable to hypothesize
that their feelings of competence would suffer as a result. A recent study in
which the self-perceptions of children with ADHD were specifically examined
highlights the importance of paying attention to this area (Dumas, D., &
Pelletier, L. (1999). A study of self-perception in hyperactive children.
American Journal of Maternal
and Child Nursing, 24, 2-9).
In this study 57 children with ADHD between the ages of 6-11 (20 girls and 37 boys) and 59
children without ADHD (25 girls and 34 boys) served as participants. Each
child completed a standardized measure to assess his or her self-perceptions
in a number of dimensions including perceived scholastic competence, social
competence, behavioral competence, and athletic competence. Children's score
on each of these dimensions reflects how competent they perceive themselves
to be in each area. (The measure that was used was called the Self-Perception
Profile for Children).
The results indicated that as a group, children with ADHD perceived
themselves to be less competent than children without ADHD in all areas
except for athletic competence. Thus, the self-perceptions of children with
ADHD were lower than those of other children in regards to how they felt
about their behavior, their ability to get along with others, and their
ability to succeed in school. As in any study that compares children in
different groups, not every child with ADHD rated their competence in these
areas as being low. On average, however, children with ADHD perceived
themselves as less competent than the other children.
The results of this study highlight the need to pay attention to the feelings
that a child with ADHD has about him or herself. In many instances,
particularly when parents are struggling to manage their child's difficult
behavior, it can be easy to lose sight of the effects that ADHD can have on
some children's self-esteem. When one considers how much negative feedback a
child with ADHD may have to contend with on a regular basis, however, it is
not difficult to imagine how this could come to adversely affect a child's feelings
about him or herself. Also, it is important to recognize that questioning
one's competence in scholastic, behavioral, and social areas may be quite
realistic for a child who is really struggling in these domains.
What can parents do to help their child to feel more competent? The first
thing, I think, is to make sure one's child is getting the best treatment
possible so that he or she can actually be more successful in school, more
successful with peers, and more successful with meeting behavioral
expectations. Although it is not always the case, children's self-concept is
often closely linked to their actual success in different important domains.
So, the more successful they can actually be in those domains, the more
competent they are likely to feel.
Another thing that can be quite helpful is providing a child with the
opportunity to talk about his or her feelings - even when those feelings are
negative. Thus, trying to engage one's child in discussions about how he
feels things are going at home, at school, with peers, etc. can provide you
with a great opportunity to learn whether your child is feeling down and
discouraged. Talking about such feelings alone may not solve the problem, but
talking can help a child develop more control over strong negative feelings.
It can also lead to a problem solving discussion about how to try and help
things go better. I know from my own experience that it can be hard to really
listen to one's saying negative things about herself
and that it is a natural reaction to want to try and help your child feel
better "right away" by pointing out all the positive things they
may be overlooking. Unfortunately, this can have the effect of keeping a
child from really getting the chance to express what is on her mind, and may
short circuit a necessary sharing of feelings. A really good book to look at
in this regard is called "How to Talk so Kids will Listen" - I
would really recommend this.
Parents can also play a very important role in helping to protect a child's
self-esteem by helping their child to develop a real area of skill and
ability. For example, helping your child to get involved - and stay involved
- in an activity where they can see themselves as improving and developing can
be a real source of satisfaction and pride. I don't even think it matters
that much what the activity is - art, music, sports, dance, etc. - the main
thing, I think, is that a child gets the opportunity to develop an area of
skill and competence. This can provide an important buffer when a child may
be struggling in other important areas of their daily life.
I went to a talk last year in which this point was stressed by Dr. Keith Conners - one of the world's leading authorities on ADHD
- as a very important contribution that parents can make to their child's
development. To my knowledge, there is not yet any research data to support
this idea. It makes a tremendous
amount of sense to me based on clinical experience, however, and I believe it
is a potentially very useful idea for parents to consider and pursue.
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